Drunken Texters and the Alcoholics Who Love Them

I’m going to be adventurous today and say that one of the best things about a night of drunk and/or high shenanigans is reading all of the nonsensical messages you sent out and received throughout the evening. 

Don’t know what I’m talking about?  Here’s a real-life example. I woke up this morning to several, short Blackberry messages from my cousin, Shanti (creator of the blog eyeofdreamer.blogspot.com) and they went like this.

 

Message 1: Cousin

Message 2: I am drunk

 

So far so good—she knows who she’s texting and she knows what state of mind she’s in…but then something shifts…

 

Message 3: Luke gone

Message 4: Its craxt

Message 5: I never been so tobr herfoire

Message 6: Goinje before

Message 7: Goine before

 

Now, a more prudent recipient of such correspondence might ask, is she okay?  Or, Who the hell is Luke?  I, however, being fluent in drunk-speak, knew that nothing she actually said mattered.  Her message was clear: I am drunk and I wanted to share this experience with you, fellow alcoholic that you are. 

Thus, I’d like to take the time to heretofore make you aware of your duties as a drunken textee:  1.)  Always respond with Huh, What, WTF or a barrage of question marks (???).  This way, when they sober up they will read your response and be forced to look back at the messages they sent throughout the night.  2.)  Do the right thing if you should happen to be the lucky go-to person for drunken messages (this includes texts, instant messages, voice mails and tweets): save and send them to me so I can post them.  Tee hee.

 

Blip Blam Bloggo

 

~Sondria!